"Querida mãe, querido pai, não sei mais conviver com as pessoas. Tenho medo de uma casa cheia de pais e mães e irmãos e sobrinhos e cunhados e cunhadas. Tenho vivido tão só durante tantos – quase 40 – anos. Devo estar acostumado. Dormir 24 horas foi a maneira mais delicada que encontrei de não perturbar o equilíbrio de vocês – que é muito delicado. E também de não perturbar o meu próprio equilíbrio – que é tão ou mais delicado. Estou me transformando aos poucos num ser humano meio viciado em solidão. E que só sabe escrever. Não sei mais falar, abraçar, dar beijos, dizer coisas aparentemente simples como "eu gosto de você". Gosto de mim. Acho que é o destino dos escritores. E tenho pensado que, mais do que qualquer outra coisa, sou um escritor. Uma pessoa que escreve sobre a vida – como quem olha de uma janela – mas não consegue vivê-la. Amo vocês como quem escreve para uma ficção: sem conseguir dizer nem mostrar isso. O que sobra é o áspero do gesto, a secura da palavra. Por trás disso, há muito amor. Amor louco – todas as pessoas são loucas, inclusive nós; amor encabulado – nós, da fronteira com a Argentina, somos especialmente encabulados. Mas amor de verdade. Perdoem o silêncio, o sono, a rispidez, a solidão. Está ficando tarde, e eu tenho medo de ter desaprendido o jeito. É muito difícil ficar adulto. Amo vocês, seu filho, Caio". E como é difícil ficar adulto...
[Caio F.]
Thursday, 31 December 2009
Wednesday, 23 December 2009
what do you like about England?
This week someone asked me what I didn't like about England, and straight away the answer comes: the weather! Then this same person asked me what I liked about it, and as funny as it may sound, I don’t think anyone has ever asked me that. I guess most people come here to work or study and they continue to idealize their homes as the perfect place, and England as this cold place with ‘cold’ people that they had to face and that they’ll never have a passion for the country itself.
I’ve got to admit that this was sort of my feeling as well. I came here to fulfil a dream of living abroad, somewhere where its native language was English, and that's when the Queen’s island came along. I used to see here as just a cold place where I could not make friends easily, locals would never become my real friends, and I have to say, even after a year here, perhaps two, such feeling still persisted.
Well, back to the original question, what I like about the UK? Hummm... It’s more about what it allowed me to live here, what this country has contributed to my personal growth. It is just precious what I have learnt about myself and the ones around me, the discovery of how much I love my parents which I didn’t have a clue of how powerful that could be before, that being alone is not feeling alone and feeling alone is not necessarily being alone, that friends are the angels we could not choose as family, that people come and go but some will always live in our hearts, that life sometimes closes doors but God always finds a way to open us a window, and that when things seem to be finally settling down life comes and changes it all over again, because that’s the cycle of life, and we must not see it negatively, some losses are just necessary.
I know that maybe any other country could have helped me experience all that, but in my case it was the cold island. I guess I’m starting to think that I actually didn’t choose the UK, for some reason, that I yet don’t know, the UK chose me. And hopefully, the best is yet to come.
[Karla]
I’ve got to admit that this was sort of my feeling as well. I came here to fulfil a dream of living abroad, somewhere where its native language was English, and that's when the Queen’s island came along. I used to see here as just a cold place where I could not make friends easily, locals would never become my real friends, and I have to say, even after a year here, perhaps two, such feeling still persisted.
Well, back to the original question, what I like about the UK? Hummm... It’s more about what it allowed me to live here, what this country has contributed to my personal growth. It is just precious what I have learnt about myself and the ones around me, the discovery of how much I love my parents which I didn’t have a clue of how powerful that could be before, that being alone is not feeling alone and feeling alone is not necessarily being alone, that friends are the angels we could not choose as family, that people come and go but some will always live in our hearts, that life sometimes closes doors but God always finds a way to open us a window, and that when things seem to be finally settling down life comes and changes it all over again, because that’s the cycle of life, and we must not see it negatively, some losses are just necessary.
I know that maybe any other country could have helped me experience all that, but in my case it was the cold island. I guess I’m starting to think that I actually didn’t choose the UK, for some reason, that I yet don’t know, the UK chose me. And hopefully, the best is yet to come.
[Karla]
Saturday, 19 December 2009
Laughing with
'Cause Regina Spektor is absolutely fantastic!
No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re starving or freezing or so very poor
No one laughs at God when the doctor calls
After some routine tests
No one’s laughing at God
when it’s gotten real late
And their kid’s not back from that party yet
No one laughs at God when their airplane
Starts to uncontrollably shake
No one’s laughing at God
When they see the one they love hand in hand
with someone else and they hope that they’re mistaken
No one laughs at God when the cops knock on their door
And they say “We’ve got some bad new, sir,”
No one’s laughing at God
When there’s a famine, fire or flood
But God can be funny
At a cocktail party while listening to a good God-themed joke or
When the crazies say he hates us
and they get so red in the head
You think that they’re about to choke
God can be funny
When told he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way
And when presented like a genie
Who does magic like Houdini
Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus
God can be so hilarious
Ha ha, ha ha
No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
when they’ve lost all they got
And they don’t know what for
No one laughs at God on the day they realize
that the last sight they’ll ever see is a pair of hateful eyes
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re saying their goodbyes
But God can be funny
At a cocktail party while listening to a good God-themed joke or
When the crazies say he hates us and they get so red in the head
you think that they’re about to choke
God can be funny
When told he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way
And when presented like a genie
Who does magic like Houdini
Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus
God can be so hilarious
No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
(repeat)
No one’s laughing at God in a hospital
No one’s laughing at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re starving or freezing or so very poor
No one’s laughing at God
(repeat)
We’re all “laughing with God”
No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re starving or freezing or so very poor
No one laughs at God when the doctor calls
After some routine tests
No one’s laughing at God
when it’s gotten real late
And their kid’s not back from that party yet
No one laughs at God when their airplane
Starts to uncontrollably shake
No one’s laughing at God
When they see the one they love hand in hand
with someone else and they hope that they’re mistaken
No one laughs at God when the cops knock on their door
And they say “We’ve got some bad new, sir,”
No one’s laughing at God
When there’s a famine, fire or flood
But God can be funny
At a cocktail party while listening to a good God-themed joke or
When the crazies say he hates us
and they get so red in the head
You think that they’re about to choke
God can be funny
When told he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way
And when presented like a genie
Who does magic like Houdini
Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus
God can be so hilarious
Ha ha, ha ha
No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
when they’ve lost all they got
And they don’t know what for
No one laughs at God on the day they realize
that the last sight they’ll ever see is a pair of hateful eyes
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re saying their goodbyes
But God can be funny
At a cocktail party while listening to a good God-themed joke or
When the crazies say he hates us and they get so red in the head
you think that they’re about to choke
God can be funny
When told he’ll give you money if you just pray the right way
And when presented like a genie
Who does magic like Houdini
Or grants wishes like Jiminy Cricket and Santa Claus
God can be so hilarious
No one laughs at God in a hospital
No one laughs at God in a war
(repeat)
No one’s laughing at God in a hospital
No one’s laughing at God in a war
No one’s laughing at God
When they’re starving or freezing or so very poor
No one’s laughing at God
(repeat)
We’re all “laughing with God”
Thursday, 17 December 2009
the hardest thing of all
"That is the hardest thing of all. It is much harder to judge yourself than to judge others. If you succeed in judging yourself, it's because you're truly a wise man."
[Antoine de Saint-Exupéry]
[Antoine de Saint-Exupéry]
Wednesday, 16 December 2009
Tudo há de passar...
Noites longas,
dias sem graça.
Já tentei de tudo,
de reza à macumba;
mas a saudade não passa.
Deito vem o pranto,
me levanto o desencanto
Até piada tentei,
mas não teve graça.
Já tentei te substituir,
mas nada parece funcionar.
A dor que deixaste em mim,
parece nunca sarar.
Mas tem nada não,
sei que essa vida não hei levar.
Acredito que tudo há de passar!
Sou mais forte que as noites e os dias,
que qualquer macumba ou desencanto.
Vou fazer da vida um teatro,
E assim re-achar seu encanto.
[KG]
dias sem graça.
Já tentei de tudo,
de reza à macumba;
mas a saudade não passa.
Deito vem o pranto,
me levanto o desencanto
Até piada tentei,
mas não teve graça.
Já tentei te substituir,
mas nada parece funcionar.
A dor que deixaste em mim,
parece nunca sarar.
Mas tem nada não,
sei que essa vida não hei levar.
Acredito que tudo há de passar!
Sou mais forte que as noites e os dias,
que qualquer macumba ou desencanto.
Vou fazer da vida um teatro,
E assim re-achar seu encanto.
[KG]
Sunday, 13 December 2009
Can love end?
Well, what about us?
“Love is gone!”,
we say.
If it is really gone,
it never love was.
Then, if we feel so,
I can only ask you one thing,
remember me as I will remember you:
a love such as in childhood,
- intense and pure.
One of those
that even after adulthood,
and all the different paths followed,
there's still enough love
to wish each the other
intense and pure
happiness.
[KG]
“Love is gone!”,
we say.
If it is really gone,
it never love was.
Then, if we feel so,
I can only ask you one thing,
remember me as I will remember you:
a love such as in childhood,
- intense and pure.
One of those
that even after adulthood,
and all the different paths followed,
there's still enough love
to wish each the other
intense and pure
happiness.
[KG]
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